Skip to main content

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

Written by Mehak Kaur on . Posted in Events, Industry News.

When it comes to teens dating, parents and guardians have plenty to worry about. Their teen’s emotions or heartbreak, staying out too late, losing focus and falling behind at school, sexual activity, STDs, or teen pregnancy, for starters. And while all of those are worthy of concern for a caring parent, many do not stop to consider another big issue facing teens: Teen Dating Violence. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month.

According to information provided by loveisrespect.org, a survey found that 81% of parents believe teen dating violence is not an issue or admit they don’t know if it’s an issue. And though 82% of parents feel confident that they could recognize the signs if their child was experiencing dating abuse, a majority of parents (58%) could not correctly identify all the warning signs of abuse.





This is troubling considering how prevalent the issue of teen dating violence is:

  • 1 in 3 high school students experience physical or sexual violence, or both, by someone they are dating
  • 10% of adolescents report being the victim of physical violence at the hands of an intimate partner during the previous year
  • Girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence — almost triple the national (US) average
  • Among female victims of intimate partner violence, 94% of those age 16-19 and 70% of those age 20-24 were victimized by a current or former boyfriend or girlfriend
  • Violent behavior typically begins between the ages of 12 and 18

What Role Can Helplines and Contact Centers Play?

Contact Centers can play a role in identifying the signs of teen dating violence, and opening up a dialogue with teens or their parents and guardians.

Listen For The Signs

  • Emotional or psychological abuse: frequent belittling, humiliation, put-downs, gaslighting (denying or twisting facts), or a constant need by one partner to control how the other thinks or feels.Controlling or coercive behavior: monitoring whereabouts, insisting on knowing every location, who they can talk toor what they can wear; pressure to engage in sexual activity or activities they’re uncomfortable with.
  • Isolation: encouraging or forcing distance from friends and family, making the teen feel they have no one to turn to.
  • Extreme jealousy or insecurity: insisting on exclusive attention, accusing others without basis, or showing up unannounced to “check in.”
  • Mood changes or withdrawal: suddenly anxious, depressed, or irritable around the partner; abrupt changes in behavior or school/work performance.
  • Digital abuse: constant texting or demanding access to passwords, reading messages, or public shaming online.
  • Physical signs or threats: any threat of or actual physical harm, or visible injuries, should be treated as urgent.

Sometimes abuse is less obvious, such as:

  • Verbal abuse: insults, name-calling, or public humiliation, including through social media or messaging.
  • Financial or resource control: Trying to limit access to money or transportation; preventing participation in activities by controlling access to money.
  • Reproductive coercion: pressuring or forcing sexual activity or pregnancy decisions.​

What You Can Do

Empathy is always key. Reflect the feelings they are sharing and acknowledge that they deserve safety and respect. Encourage teens to describe what’s happening in their own words. They may share feelings of shame or embarrassment. Sometimes reassuring them that unhealthy dynamics can creep into teen relationships, just as they do for adults, can help reduce those feelings. Use non-judgmental, open-ended questions: “What makes you feel safe or unsafe in this relationship?” or “Has your partner ever tried to control who you see or what you do online?” This helps teens disclose with less fear of judgment.

Of course, assessing for and ensuring safety is very important. You may even use assessment tools like the ones available in iCarol to help determine how much risk is present. Common assessments for risk of violence include questions around recent threats, violence, weapon use, grooming, or if the teen fears for their safety. If there is imminent danger, follow your organization’s safety protocol and local emergency guidance.

Offering referrals and other practical options and support can also be productive, though keep in mind what may or may not be available to a minor without their parental consent or involvement in your state/province. You might discuss confidential resources, safety planning (how to leave safely, who to contact, where to go), and options for reporting if the teen wants to. Offer to connect them with trusted adults, counselors, or domestic violence shelters as appropriate.

Teens are in a period of their lives where they are exploring their own identity and autonomy. Treating them as such can help build rapport and trust, and support the teen’s agency. Avoid pressuring them to leave a relationship if they’re not ready or giving advice. Reflecting back that you hear how fearful, concerned, anxious, or upset they are may help them come to their own conclusions about what they want to do, and the future of the relationship. Provide information and options so they can decide next steps.

Teens may be scared about telling their parents or guardians about the situation, but having a trusted adult aware of the situation is important for the teen’s safety. You can help them prepare for difficult conversations by roleplaying or helping them talk through their plans to share what they’re experiencing with a trusted adult. Rather than assume who they should speak to, it may be helpful to ask them what adults they trust most. Not all teens have a good relationship with a parent. If that’s the case, perhaps there is a grandparent, aunt or uncle, teacher or counselor, coach, or some other adult that they can open up to first.

Responding to disclosures of Teen Dating Violence

These are some ideas for how you might address a situation where a teen shares concerns about the health of their relationship. Remember to always consult with your manager, and follow policies or available trainings that are endorsed by your organization:

  • Validate without judgment: “What you’re describing sounds really tough. I’m glad you told me.”
  • ​Clarify boundaries and safety: assess whether the teen is in immediate danger and help create a short-term safety plan if needed.
  • Document carefully: keep clear, non-judgmental notes of disclosures, concerns, and steps offered; this helps if the teen seeks further help or authorities become involved.
  • Connect to age-appropriate resources: provide helpline numbers, local domestic violence resources, school counselors, and mental health supports.

To learn more about Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, visit:
loveisrespect.org
teendvmonth.org
CDC – Preventing Teen Dating Violence
Dating Violence Prevention

Other References used for this blog:

Events, healthy relationships, Intimate Partner Violence, teen dating violence, teen health

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *